It’s a Beautiful Life:

Celebrating Our Mother, Jessie Dickey

“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”  

Writing this article in honor of our mother, Jessie Rae Dickey, has been no small feat.  How do you put into words all that she is, all that she has become, in such a way as to do some bit of justice to the life that she leads?  As her daughters, we have especially been on the receiving end of her generous spirit. She has taught us valuable life lessons which we didn’t quite recognize until she became the one to be cared for, due to ALS.  With her voice she aptly schooled us on how to behave, how to respond to the world around us with confidence and grace. Through the touch of her loving arms we learned how to hug our own children, to be strong-willed yet warm-spirited. The miles she’s walked with us through our life cannot be accurately counted: encouraging our activities, leading by example to play fair, and running toward our goals, not away from them.  Our mom has always had sparks of greatness; she has always been special, unique, beautiful.  We just regret that it’s taken this long for us to see her as completely as we can now, in the stillness and quiet of her room, with only the rhythmic sound of a ventilator to keep the time and provide some background noise.  We look at her now just as she is, and realize in awe how drastically her fragile exterior body conflicts with the strength and purity of the interior of her heart: she is stunning.

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." John 16:33

Mom was diagnosed with ALS in January of 2007, on her birthday to be exact.  And in a sense that was an appropriate date to receive such seemingly tragic news, for it is because of that news that we truly have begun to actively celebrate her life, cherishing the woman she has become, the mother and grandmother and great-grandmother she is, and embracing the everyday challenges and changes that this disease brings with it.  ALS may have taken her voice, her arms and her legs, but it has not taken her spirit, her soul. We now recognize the strength she has always tried to inspire in us, the determination to love life. Though she cannot talk now, she still communicates her love through her warm eyes and her sweet smile. Though she cannot lift her grandbabies, she carries the weight of having to be strong for us, so we don’t crumble from the enormity of her illness. Though she cannot walk, she moves forward with her life, in order to give us more time with her. ALS has not taken away the best of our mom her heart.

He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”  2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Jessie, our mother, in some circles known as “Baby Rae,” and in some online chat rooms known affectionately as “ThinkPos,” has approached her journey with ALS with a sense of hope, positive energy, humble strength, and a will to live, a will to “fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run,” as the poet Rudyard Kipling would say.  The friendships she shares with her fellow ALS support group members and all of the newly-found and cherished relationships she has made in light of her diagnosis, has widened her circle of support to such a degree that the love and encouragement she feels overwhelms any sense of sorrow this disease could bring.  Friends and family alike have stood alongside and basked in the abundance of love and contagious spunk she exudes.  People who don’t know mom might think that it’s her family that gets her through this storm in her life; they would be wrong.  It’s mom who has pulled us through it.  In her bodily weakness, she has been made strong in heart, and all of us who know her well and love her much are held up by her grace and her faith. 

“Heroes take journeys, confront dragons, and discover the treasure of their true selves.”

Mom doesn’t deserve ALS—no one does, but illness is never about reaping one’s just deserts.  On the contrary, it illuminates the beauty of one’s life; it’s about honoring that life and celebrating that legacy.  The best parts of our mom live in us, and in our children.  We see her in their pride, in their determination, in their stubbornness, in their mischievous smile, and we  see her in our own strengths as mothers—our unfailing love, our quickness to forgive.  And most brilliantly of all, we see the glory of an awesome Creator whose light is reflected in mom’s heart even more brightly now than before…and we know her life’s worth. 

Written with love and hope by her daughters,

Kim Howell, Michelle Alexander, & Diane Walton